I've never really wanted to elope. I've always imagined having the typical wedding with lots of family and friends at a short ceremony then a rockin' reception with an amazing meal afterwards. You know, something that everyone would remember. Just a big old celebration where his family and my family meets and has fun. And our friends all meet each other. I would get to wear a gorgeous dress, have my hair all fancy and my girls would all get to be there all fancied up too. We'd have wonderful pictures taken that we would have forever to show our kids one day.
But.
After my disappointing first dress shopping adventure and some recent absolutely stupid family drama, I'm looking into packages to Hawaii for just myself and the fiance. For this year, not next. Sometimes I just think about the stress that having the whole experience would bring and I just get scared. All along we have both said that we want things as simple as possible because we aren't those kind of people that have to have all the best of the best. We're also the kind of people who couldn't afford that anyway.
So far, the things that have been planned aren't really that extravagant or outlandishly overpriced (although to be fair, I haven't really priced out all that much so far as plans aren't really at that stage yet where we have to worry about paying for anything yet). Except that I know that things will add up very fast once that happens. That also scares the bejesus out of me.
Did I mention that the first piece of advice almost every person gives us when I mention a wedding is to elope?
And yes, the wedding dress shopping was horrible. I felt like I wasn't actually there the whole time and my sister ended up to be the only person who could come with and she was absolutely no help. And of course, the dress I badly want costs much more than I ever imagined spending on a wedding dress. That might be part of my sudden change of heart to maybe elope; I don't think I would be as disappointed in not getting that dress if we just get married on a beach in Hawaii. I think I would be perfectly happy with a simple destination wedding dress.
My concern with a destination wedding before was not being able to pull of a simple dress because of my weight. But for some reason, at this point, that doesn't even phase me in the least. Which is totally weird for me!
On the other hand, when one of my best friends eloped to Las Vegas I was so disappointed and hurt. Don't get me wrong, I was totally happy for them because it was what they wanted. But we had always talked about being bridesmaids for each other so to not have that opportunity, it hurt. Since I know how that feels, I wouldn't want to do that to the girls I have already asked to stand up for me. The question is though, is this a situation where I can be selfish? Am I allowed to only worry about me? That is so far from who I am, I worry that I will have regret later on if I do. Then again, will have I experience similar regret if I go through with the traditional wedding?
I'm so full of confusion about this all of a sudden and I wish I had someone who would be honest with me and help me decide. Of course, I've spoken to the fiance about it but he's (and bless him for this) one of those guys who is happy with whatever I want. Besides he originally wanted to elope!
